Failure as Fuel: Rachel Pederson's Journey

Rachel Pederson's journey from welfare recipient to working with industry titans like Russell Brunson isn't your typical success story. What makes her path remarkable isn't just how far she's come, but her willingness to shine a light on her failures—both past and present.

As a naturally introverted pastor's daughter raised in poverty, Rachel learned early that "survivors never quit." This mindset carried her through alcoholism, debt, and single motherhood at 21, leading to beauty school and a career as a hairstylist. But everything changed when a salon client asked about her marketing approach and unexpectedly offered her a consulting position. Within nine months of taking her business seriously, Rachel had replaced both her income and her husband's.

In our conversation, Rachel courageously opens up about a recent business failure—her "90 Day Business Magic" program that collapsed under the weight of medical issues, grief, and family crises. Rather than glossing over this setback, she unpacks the valuable lessons learned: the importance of stepping back when things aren't working, creating distance for objective analysis, and sometimes having the courage to abandon ship completely.

The most transformative element of Rachel's journey has been her practice of gratitude. Following a public breakdown that damaged her reputation, she rebuilt with gratitude as her foundation—starting each day appreciating her cozy bed and celebrating small wins with enthusiastic "yas!" exclamations. This seemingly simple practice has revolutionized both her business approach and life experience.

What's particularly refreshing about Rachel's philosophy is her commitment to accessibility. Drawing from her experience finding designer shoes for 99 cents during her struggling days, she understands that free and affordable offerings create lasting loyalty. This belief guides her business model, where she prioritizes giving away high-quality content rather than hoarding knowledge behind paywalls.

Whether you're facing burnout, questioning your business direction, or simply seeking authentic connection in your entrepreneurial journey, Rachel's insights remind us that there's always hope after failure—

Chapters

• 0:00 Meet Rachel Peterson: Social Media Strategist
• 3:00 From Poverty to Entrepreneurship
• 9:00 Discovering Social Media Marketing by Accident
• 14:30 Confronting Recent Business Failures
• 22:30 Stepping Back: Learning from Mistakes
• 32:00 The Transformative Power of Gratitude
• 40:00 Finding Hope After Challenges

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hello, welcome back to a very special episode of Overcome Yourself, the podcast. As you know, my name is Nicole and I am thrilled, excited, humbled, to be here with one of my mentors, who I even got to intern with all the way back in 2020, right before the whole world closed down. That was like the last project I did, I remember, because we had to end early. But here she is, the amazing Rachel Peterson. So, rachel, please take it away. Introduce yourself. You are the queen of social media, but let us know a little bit about who you are and who you help.

Speaker 2: 0:38

Oh, I love that. Nicole, first and foremost I want to say thank you for having me. I'm so excited to be here. It's funny that you actually brought up the internship, because just the other day I got that little, that itch feeling again like, ooh, what if we did it even better? Like, oh my gosh. So I think about that internship all the time to this day. So, and it's funny because sometimes we think that, like, people don't recognize our names you know what I mean Like, oh, there's no way that they recognize my name. Every time I search for a few core assets inside of my drive, your name comes up and it's there. So I see your name every time I search for this one specific lead magnet and this one. Isn't that so wild how that works.

Speaker 1: 1:23

I know.

Speaker 2: 1:24

So I'm Rachel Peterson. I'm a social media strategist. At this point, I've been in business for over 10 years and along the way some really cool things have happened. I've worked with clients such as Dean Graciosi. Russell Brunson still kind of blows my mind a little bit because I just feel like this you know, I'm just like a mom from Minnesota with three kids and life does not always feel that glamorous, but business has had some really cool wins in it. I'm an avid writer and reader. I love movies and studying storytelling and psychology and I'm obsessed with a lot of craft things, like my curtains behind me. I know people can't see it on the podcast, but I sewed them for the dimensions of our windows and then like arranged everything. So I'm kind of just this like homebody nerd in my personal life cooking, cleaning, sewing I love that stuff, but I'm super excited to be here.

Speaker 1: 2:15

I'm so excited that you're here now. Um, one of the requests that you made of me was to ask you directly. We in the question one of the questions in the form you're like, just ask me this on the show. So you've had to overcome yourself. You have such an incredible story. It's in your book. I loved your book, by the way, got to read it on the beach, you know. I bought it and every time I went to the beach I read it. So I have that awesome association. But I want you to tell my audience your story of how you went from really broke. You're a hairdresser, you were an alcoholic and now you're the queen of social media and you're like a nerdy homebody and you're just making things happen. So tell us the story of Rachel.

Speaker 2: 3:02

Okay, so I grew up the daughter of a pastor and a worship leader just at different churches growing up, and so, even though I'm actually super, super introverted people don't believe me on that, but I'm the type of person where, like I need alone time. I don't necessarily want to be center stage, I'm just as happy making costumes for a musical as I would be like starring. In fact, I think I get more joy out of that. Um, but I learned from an early age like kind of how to show up and be resilient. I grew up in, um, definitely the definition of poverty, and so because of that, like there were so many life lessons that my dad specifically like instilled in me if you don't have the time, you better have the money. Um, he would say you're a survivor, survivors never quit, survivors never give up. And I was like okay, and that was really locked in for me, those mindsets. But it didn't exactly get easy before it got easy. Still isn't easy, still waiting for that part to kick in. But I kind of was like lost with my life at the age of 20, which most people are and I was partying, I was definitely an alcoholic, I was broke, had so much debt. And then all of a sudden, I found out I was gonna be had so much debt. And then all of a sudden I found out I was going to be a mom at 21. And I was like I got to figure something out. Anything, I'll take anything. So I went and applied for jobs like Taco Bell. Got denied. I was devastated. Um, applied at all of the every single job I could find online and nothing was working out and I realized I think I need some skillset to like get me jobs. So I went to school for hair, took out another 20 grand right there in certain loans. So I'm drowning in debt, single mom, freshly off of welfare, and I became a hairstylist.

Speaker 2: 5:01

Now, I worked as a hairstylist. I loved, loved that job. I thought it was so fun. I love hair and like creativity and just beauty. I love creating beauty. But, um, while I was working in that job, I met my husband, paul, and sorry for another time we eloped 13 days after we met, which was, in hindsight, a great decision for us specifically, um, but I had this client sit down in my chair after I married paul once. I was pregnant with baby number two, still in debt. Still no clue what I'm gonna do with my life.

Speaker 2: 5:34

Um, this client sat down and we started talking about like business and marketing. And she was like so how do you do marketing as a hairstylist? And I was like I don't know, I just post, and then they show up I'll post a before and after of extensions or a before and after of a curly hair transformation, right, like here's how we defined the curls. And I was like and then clients just book. And she was like do you want to be our marketing consultant? Turns out her and her husband owned a fast food fried chicken franchise. And I was like sure, I don't really like fried chicken and I don't really know a lot about marketing, but let's do it. So I said yes, and then I learned everything along the way as I went, usually just in time for a meeting or a question, and that's that was the start of it.

Speaker 2: 6:22

And then I dove in fully and started learning, started looking for new clients, and it took me about a year to realize, oh, I could do this on my own outside of, like, the traditional routes. So I went for it. Um, from the time I went serious I will never forget. It was November 2015 and I was like I going to publish the website and get serious about this and I replaced my income from my day job within less than six months, and then I replaced Paul's income from his day job within a total of nine months. So in nine months we went from us both working full time and the side gig to whoa whoa. This just replaced both our jobs. I think we're kind of serious about this now and then. That's kind of what has evolved into where we are today that is amazing and it's so inspiring.

Speaker 1: 7:14

Right, because you, you didn't have the advantages that a lot of times we hear other people had. I had money, I had this, I had an inheritance, and you, you had. I had money, I had this, I had an inheritance, and you, you had to. You had to, you know, crawl your way up and like, I've followed along with your story and I've seen a lot of your videos and so, you know, you got that strong parasocial relationship and it's just so beautiful that now you get to, you get to run your business with your husband and you get to, you know, travel the world and go to Spain and buy a wedding dress.

Speaker 2: 7:49

You know what's funny about that story? I actually didn't mean to buy a wedding dress in Spain, so because I grew up like poor, I didn't know that there were real stores where you had to ring a doorbell to go in. But I had seen it in bridesmaids and I thought it was the fanciest, bougiest, coolest thing ever.

Speaker 2: 8:07

And we're walking through the streets of Spain for an event for our click students and literally I see a doorbell and I'm like Prono Vias, I've heard of that before, let's set up an appointment. And I bought my wedding dress in Spain on impulse, kind of like how I do a lot of things in my personal life.

Speaker 1: 8:25

That is cool, but that's so cool that you got to be there and that you were able to do that right and just be like, yeah, I'm taking home the dress, so congratulations, that's amazing.

Speaker 2: 8:34

Thank you.

Speaker 1: 8:35

You're very welcome, but you told me that you wanted to actually talk about something that's a little sensitive, but it's really important and impactful, and so we were talking about 90 Day Business Magic, a program that you ran and I just happened to mention it because you know I do that with you too, and then so take it away. What is it that you wanted to tell me about that? And what that has to do with failure.

Speaker 2: 9:05

So well, let's, let's talk about failure. So there's something interesting in business and marketing, but anytime someone is put into a position of like a platform or a pedestal, they're seen as an expert in any capacity. There's this like belief they should have everything figured out. I think we all assume that. I assumed that for so long that you know Marie Forleo's life was butterflies and roses. I straight up was like I know she says it's not, but I'm not seeing evidence to prove anything other than she's got everything together. And I was like oh, I'm so, I feel so messy compared to that, just because that's what I'm seeing, and I I don't know.

Speaker 2: 9:46

I felt like failure for a long time. I felt like it was shame-filled and I had to kind of try to gloss over it and hide it. And I've been working for the last probably five years on starting to call out my own failures faster. So I had a recent failure and I wanted to talk about it because I don't want it to be like oh, a decade ago I made a mistake. No, I made a mistake last year.

Speaker 2: 10:08

So we launched this program called 90 Days Business Magic and the whole premise was I'm going to build this anonymous, faceless brand, which I still really want to do, but I know not to now. I want to build this anonymous, faceless brand related to sewing, which is one of my passions, I love it so much, and then I'm going to allow people to watch me build it Like watch my entire process happen. And then this has never happened like this before. As soon as we launched both so 90 day business magic is open I'm excited and stoked about sewing house I was like this is going to be, this is gonna be huge. Suddenly, like it was the perfect storm of medical issues, grief, uh, a situation happened with a family member that was intense and I was like I don't know how to dig out of this one. And I don't know, nicole, are you like this? I? I struggle to cut loose like things that aren't working. I will hold on to something for ever and be like no, I can still fix this. Do you ever feel that way too?

Speaker 1: 11:24

Yes, yes.

Speaker 2: 11:25

I relate, yes, yes.

Speaker 2: 11:28

And there comes a point and some of us ignore it, me included where it's like this is not working and I'm spending so much energy now just trying to make this work and I don't know what it is, but I can't see it while I'm in it and I just kept trying and I was like lim what it is, but I can't see it while I'm in it and I just kept trying and I was like limping along through this and meanwhile I mean I had this medical adverse reaction to a prescription and it was like making me lethargic and I had no energy and this snowball of things I was like I don't even know where to start and it took me quite a few months to finally be like I messed up, I can't dig out of this one.

Speaker 2: 12:10

I probably should have said this like three, four months ago, but I was just like, oh my gosh, I actually have to abandon ship and then address the ship that's sinking behind me. And thankfully it wasn't like a big thing, it wasn't like sewing houses built up, and then we didn't have stock for the orders we had just collected or something like that.

Speaker 2: 12:31

There was the business manager side and I was like, oh, I feel so awful because this 90 day business magic group they still got to see my inner workings of how I approach business and there was a lot in depth. But I was like I just feel like crap. And because I felt like crap about this failure, which is a common pattern, I was like maybe I'll just keep trying harder to overcompensate. So it was like I'd go under and then I would overcompensate and I'm like still not fixing it. And I wanted to talk about it because it's recent and it sucked and it stung.

Speaker 2: 13:05

And I even had one person report me to the Better Business Bureau because she was like this is not good. And I was like you know what? I'm going to own it this time and face it as early as I can. Now that I realize this is failing, I'm going to take it on and be okay with it, cancel payments, make refunds as necessary. But dang, I messed this up. It was not the right offer, not the right timing, and there's something so beautiful about being able to have a recent one to reference now for, yep, that was a failure, so yeah.

Speaker 1: 13:40

But you ended up pivoting.

Speaker 2: 13:43

I pivoted once. So that was another attempt to like let's write the ship, let's, let's do everything we can and I there is something to be said, you might agree with me on this. There's something to be said for trying to write the ship. Like, what can we do to try, you know, pivot and make a course correct? So I pivoted into a whole other topic, which was um, meditations, affirmations and hypnosis just the ones that you listen to that are positive while you sleep or while you're just like. I just need a quick pick me up because I I'm obsessed with those. I love them huge fan. I love nlp.

Speaker 2: 14:18

I study it pretty obsessively and I started there. And then it still didn't work. Nicole and I was like I am so uncomfortable with every single thing about this, I'm uncomfortable with all decisions. I shed a lot of tears because I was like I feel like a failure and I've got this email from Sarah that is reminding me that I am a complete and total failure. Okay, maybe it's time to actually say I gave it a good go. I attempted to upright the ship and nothing worked. Those are the hardest moments when you put your all in and something just doesn't. It just isn't connecting or working, but that's yeah. That was the after the first big pivot. I was like for some reason this isn't working, or my heart's not in it or something you know.

Speaker 1: 15:07

Yes, and so what advice do you have for someone who's facing that and who says you know what this is not working Like? Where, where do you, where do you go from there?

Speaker 2: 15:19

Ooh Okay. So something I struggle with and others might feel the same way is when I'm faced with impending doom, like something that just isn't working. I struggle with feeling like, with honoring the step back needed. So I am a big believer that we can step back and analyze the situation, but we actually have to create a little distance for a few days or a week. You know what I mean Like fully step back. I'm going to take a break, I'm going to pause and it needs to be communicated. I am going to reevaluate some things because this is not flowing how I wanted it to. I'll let you guys know what I come up with in a week.

Speaker 2: 16:04

So stepping back can be a really helpful thing. That's also helped me a lot in relationships. So if I'm in a conversation with, like a kid or with Paul and it's not that we're like screaming or throwing things, but like if we're at an impasse I'll say, hey, I don't think we're going to get on the same page today. Are you cool if we, you know, bring this up tomorrow or the day after, after we get some good sleep? You know like let's go have a weekend sleep and then let's talk about this. So the step back is huge. And then being like, okay, let's get radically aware of why didn't this work? How can I prevent that from happening? Is this a sinking ship? That's inevitable? Or is there just a few holes we need to plug through stepping back, so that step back is everything? And then kind of having that radical self-awareness of, oh, this doesn't work because I am wired this way and this is not something I want to change at this time, that's a huge thing. Have you found things like that to be helpful?

Speaker 1: 17:04

Yes, it makes me think of the book the Untethered Soul and learning to take a step back. I don't know if you were the one that I know you recommended Happy Pocket Full of Money, so I'm in the process of reading that that one's like. So I'm in the process of reading that that one's like. I don't know what I was expecting, but it was not. It was like quantum physics from chapter one. You know what I mean, but it's not happening to you. It's it's happening to you, but like you're watching it and so you, you create that separation. So things are easier, it's less emotional, it's it's more you can look at the whole board, versus being stuck in that moment um, because then you get stuck in fight or flight.

Speaker 1: 18:02

Freeze, yeah you know, and and then you're not helpful to yourself or to anyone.

Speaker 2: 18:08

It's so true, and especially for those of us who who maybe I mean, I know I'm wired this way where it's like I have to be doing to prove my worth um gotta stay busy, you gotta prove you're working hard, you've gotta um like some of the things that were instilled in me about hard work were are really helpful in many ways, and in some ways, like that is a limit, it's a limiting belief like I have to work hard always to be making good money. I have to be doing to prove my value. And the truth is we all probably need to spend like at least one day a week stepping back and being the observer, and I know I need that.

Speaker 2: 18:53

So the in-betweens are just as important as the doing, if not more important to make sure that when I'm doing, it's the right things in the right way or the best way.

Speaker 1: 19:03

Yes, getting comfortable with being instead of doing and just being. That's been a big lesson for me, really. Yes, yeah, yeah, especially with our hustle culture, right, like we're always, like you said, just going, going, going. You have to be productive, but rest is productive. You have to be productive, but rest is productive. You know, taking time off, like you said, if you're so busy and there's so much going on around you?

Speaker 2: 19:51

how are you going to connect with the source? How you know, like, how are you going to hear back from you? Know, those, those inklings like the you know, like our intuition, like we can't hear it if we're too busy doing a bunch of other stuff? I do think that's where, um, having like mentors or consultants or even just like sounding boards is so big. People who can, you know, step back as the observer when you're like in intense moments, and they can say, hey, I'm just going to be honest with you, that's not even what you want to be doing right now.

Speaker 2: 20:13

Like this is so not a focus? I think that you can table this for later. You don't have to abandon it, but you can come back to it. Or hey, no, I saw your face light up when you were talking about this. I think you're letting fear stop you. Like those voices in our lives. They can step in as those stop that gap observers. When we're in busy seasons and especially for those of us who have, like kids, you know it's always a busy- season, you don't know what a Tuesday is going to bring.

Speaker 2: 20:43

So for me that's Paul. It's been mentors and then, like I, get to go into companies as a consultant and they're too close to the force. They're staring at each reel's performance and I'm like no, look at the bigger picture, look at what this is all creating. Don't focus on the one that didn't perform. Look at this. So that's where those sounding boards can be so big. And yeah, Paul's my number one. I don't pay him enough for that, but he's great.

Speaker 1: 21:10

And I think that speaks to the importance of community. Right, like we can't, we can't do this alone, like no matter what type of business you have or no matter what type of life you have, even if you're not in business, we, we need community, we need mentors. Yeah, we need community.

Speaker 2: 21:28

We need mentors. Yeah, so I need them, that's for sure. Every every day or week, I'm talking to someone who we act for sounding boards for each other. Is this a good idea? Have you seen this? Do you think this would help me? You know? And that saves so much time.

Speaker 1: 21:45

Yes, it's like masterminding right, and something that I talk about in my book is books. Is, you know, getting with your mentors and reading their books and watching their free videos? You know like you provide a lot of free resources. I wanted to ask you about that, you know, because I feel like you want to make things accessible to everyone and you talk in your content about how you are one of those freebie people. That's how you got started, that's how I got started, so can you, can you talk to me a little bit about how that plays a role in your business and in how you help others?

Speaker 2: 22:22

Yes, so you know how some people are money hardwired. They love making money. They love, they love money. They love the process of it. I've never been naturally hardwired that way. I don't know how much is in my bank account at any given time. I didn't when I was poor either.

Speaker 1: 22:41

I just didn't care. I was like I'll just see what happens.

Speaker 2: 22:45

I don't spend much money and I think that actually would surprise most people. I'm very thrifty, very cheap. If my kids are like can we get canes? I'm like, I don't like fried chicken, but I can make killer fried chicken at home.

Speaker 2: 22:58

I'm the make it at home mom, and I think sometimes my kids wish I weren't that way. But money like to me the perfect society wouldn't have money, even though I know that that's not real, like it doesn't really exist in this day and age. So for me, money doesn't motivate me as much as seeing people create change. And so an interesting thing is that I know that to run a business hire a team, lead people, provide things at the level I want to it all does cost money. So I'm like cool, I'm going to release as much as I can for free, and some things will be organized and compiled to make sure that this, basically this institution, can keep running itself without us running into the ground or anything. So free things, I will say, have transformed my life and the lives of millions of other people. I am a huge believer in free. It's how I decide who I'm going to like and trust. It's how I find what I'm going to fall in love with.

Speaker 2: 24:00

Cheap is amazing too. I know a lot of people in my space they will just talk down about, like freebie seekers and low ticket offers, but when I was a single mom on welfare, I needed a pair of dress shoes for a wedding and I found a pair. I won't say what brand it is, but I found a pair of designer shoes for 99 cents and they were beat up, but they worked really well. I still have them in my closet, I still wear them, I still love them, and now I know that that designer creates lasting, quality clothes. So if I ever needed a fancy dress and I was at a store that had that designer, I might be like huh, okay, this one will last the test of time. So there's something about free and cheap that can actually bring in premium buyers in a way that most people wouldn't expect, and it's a great way to, you know, make yourself stand out from the sea of people who are peddling stuff they've never even done so yeah love that and that is such a great analogy.

Speaker 1: 25:05

I love thrift shopping, I love the treasure hunts. Um, I found so many good things, you know, and then they're very inexpensive. You're like, oh yes, they didn't know what this was.

Speaker 2: 25:14

Yes, that's what we always think well there are certain stores we'll walk into and we're like oh, they know, they know and all of us are high and you're like no, I was looking for the weird hidden gem with like a you know chipped enamel on the front or something you know, yes, yeah, yes, yes, and I'm also very like my.

Speaker 1: 25:33

my grandma was a seamstress, and so you know like I learned to say okay, okay, hold on. Hold on, hold on. I got another one for you. My birthday is April 1st, no way you're an april fool too yes, yes, yes, yes. I was like oh my god, I have to remember to tell her that I'm so glad you remembered um.

Speaker 2: 25:58

Okay, so do you love your april 1st birthday? Sorry, I know this is a tangent, but do you love your april 1st birthday?

Speaker 1: 26:04

no, everyone birthday. No, everyone loves to play pranks. Nobody believed I was being born, yep.

Speaker 2: 26:11

I love it, but everyone always thinks I'm joking when I say it's my birthday and I'm like well then, I've been joking for 36 years because it is still my birthday, so I love it though.

Speaker 1: 26:23

Oh, we're twins, I know right, Different years, but we're twins. And then both of our grandmas were seamstresses, so so, yeah, so we were talking about the thrift store and how, like you know, if I find something and like there's a button missing, I'm like I can fix it.

Speaker 2: 26:38

Yeah, I know, I'm currently working on my button jar. You know how my grandma both my grandmas had button jars and they just collected buttons. Yes, so I'm working on my button jar. Both, both of my daughters actually mostly my older daughter, dakota she's been sewing a lot of stuffed animals by hand. We have a scrap bin where all of our old clothes with cool fabrics. We put them there so that we never have to buy fabric for test projects or even full-on projects. It makes me sound like I'm like cheap, but I'm like, yeah, I literally grew up scrappy. So, um, yeah, she was like, do you have a button jar? And I was like that's what I'm missing. I don't have a button jar yet. So, oh, I love that, you know all of that.

Speaker 1: 27:21

Yes, I'm thinking about my button jar. It's like in this little plastic, and then it has the little ladle and the whole thing is full and you know you can see through it.

Speaker 1: 27:27

It's like in this little plastic, and then it has the little ladle and the whole thing is full and you know you could see through it, it's so cool I love, and I'm pretty sure, um, I collected them from different grandmas and stuff, you know, and I put them all together, um, so, yeah, there you go, that's, you can look for buttons in the thrift store anyway, um, you are so much fun, um, all right, one. One last thing that I wanted to talk to you about, one of the big foundational things of my book, like the, the secret sauce I discovered, right, like what I found at the at the bottom of the well, or, so to speak, um gratitude. Can you talk to me a little bit about what role gratitude has played in your journey? It?

Speaker 2: 28:07

needs to be like breathing. It needs to be like breathing. Okay, so, as I built my entire business one of the hard parts for me is I'm a very verbal processor. Whether I'm by myself and talking into like talk to text, or I'm journaling, I got to get words out. And the first time that I built my business, I realized almost for and I say the first time because there wasn't, there was a clear before and after in the first, like the come up, the first big come up, I realized that not everybody else was like living and breathing the business the same way I was, and so it made me feel very like, not isolated. But I kept a lot to myself, which just basically meant that I was limiting the expressions of gratitude throughout the day, and so it wasn't as enjoyable. I wasn't grateful for oh wow, we sold this program today. That's so fun. Oh wow, our new student just got this from this. That's incredible.

Speaker 2: 29:14

I really missed out on just savoring the moments and I felt like maybe if I try harder or build this bigger or make it more impressive, more people will care as much as I do, and that was not what flipped the switch at all. It was actually gratitude that had to come first. So three years ago I had like a public breakdown. It's fully documented, it's everywhere. Zero out of 10 recommend.

Speaker 2: 29:40

But it was wild because when I came back I had to kind of basically rebuild everything, because overnight I pretty much well, not overnight, it was like three months. I had to kind of basically rebuild everything because overnight I pretty much well, not overnight, it was like three months. I tanked my reputation and people were like now we're nervous about her. And so I came back and there were a lot of crickets in a lot of places that used to have a lot of chatter and I was just like this is uncomfortable.

Speaker 2: 30:03

And so I decided to start with gratitude as much as possible. And over the last three years it has gotten to the point where I wake up and I go and this is so cheesy because I always said I wouldn't be this person I'm so grateful for this cozy bed and then but I'm also grateful that I get to have some coffee, let's wake up, and then Paul and I make the bed and that's our act of like gratitude for the bed, the linens, everything I used to like. Be annoyed with the people who are always like gratitude, gratitude, gratitude and truth be told, it has changed everything. I swear my face like it has been lighting up differently lately, because I'm experiencing gratitude in the small just as much as the big, if not more, that's such a big deal.

Speaker 1: 30:50

Um, the soul of money. Um, it was recommended to me and there is a quote where it was talking about abundance, like how, how, like, yeah, it shows up. And so, like, when you first wake up in the morning, if you're like, oh, I didn't get enough sleep again, yes, that's a symptom of lack.

Speaker 2: 31:13

Yes, and then right then you're vibrating at the resonance of lack. So it sounds weird, but you have to focus on here's what we do have. There's an abundance of. Oh. We've got heat. In the winter it might not be as hot as I want, but it is here. I'm grateful for that.

Speaker 1: 31:34

Yeah, ac in the summer.

Speaker 2: 31:36

So grateful this summer especially. But yeah, and I know a lot of times people will say like but how can you be grateful when you don't feel like you have anything and what? I would challenge people to do? So I'm bipolar type one, which means that there's stuff that happens internally that people don't always see. So there are struggles, abundant everywhere. Ok, you know what? I'm abundant? That I have a brain that can handle multiple thoughts at once, cool, ok. So there's abundance. I'm grateful that my bed doesn't have to be in my kitchen. I'm grateful for that, so you can look for what is true. And just by doing that, you will attract to be like oh, things aren't going how I want. Now I'm like got to stop, go back, go back to gratitude. What is going well? Let's focus there.

Speaker 1: 32:43

Yes, and it's to help you reframe right, because we're looking at the same thing, we're just looking at it a little bit differently. It makes me think of the glasses. Remember from National Treasure that they had to change all the lenses and they were looking at the same map, but depending on which lens. Now you got to go back and watch it with your kids.

Speaker 2: 33:01

Okay, I haven't watched it because I don't like Nicolas Cage. Now I need to see that scene because I'm going to use that. I'm going to say Nicole Tuxbury taught me this a really cool framework. It comes from National Treasure. No, but like I love that.

Speaker 1: 33:18

Yeah, but that's what it is right and we have a whole section of our brain that is helpful to us in practicing gratitude, like that's where gratitude comes from, and so we have to practice it. We, you know it's just like you can't do a hundred pushups right now If you've never done a pushup in your life. Like it's going to be really hard to try to be like a hundred things I'm grateful for. But as we go practicing, little by little, we get stronger and it gets easier and so I love it.

Speaker 2: 33:48

Something that always helps me too with that, because sometimes I can get really into a state of like victimhood and feel really sorry for myself. I get very negative if I'm not careful, and so I sometimes have to go to like the basics and I'll go. Okay, I can't do a single push up, but I have arms. I'm grateful I have arms. Okay, what's this? Well, somewhere in there there's a muscle. So I have muscles and my muscles can grow. Okay, I'm grateful for that. And then I'm like that's all I got. Today I'm going to try one pushup and like that helps me when I'm like in that like super negative place and be like let's go back to the most basic things. Would life be harder without arms? Yes, I have friends. Without arms it is there are more challenges. So today I'm grateful for these extensions and that actually does do some reframing for me.

Speaker 1: 34:39

Yes, and like gratitude, like you said it's the studies show that it can even improve your health like it can help you feel less pain.

Speaker 1: 34:48

So like these are documented things and so, like you're saying, just feeling that gratitude for those body parts is bringing awareness, you're bringing more blood, like it's just a cascade of different things that happen just by you taking a moment to get into your body, because, especially us, we're neurodivergent. Sometimes it sounds really weird if you're not, but like you feel like life is happening somewhere else and you're over here and so doing things like that, like I'm grateful for my hands, I'm grateful for my arms, I'm grateful that my back hurts, because at least I can still feel it, I can still walk um, that helps us reframe and that brings attention to those body parts and then it helps, it helps with other things. So I love that. I think that's amazing, um, and I love your examples of how you apply it, like in your, in your real life. Like as soon as you wake up yeah, it's not like I didn't get enough sleep it's like oh, my god, this bed is so comfy.

Speaker 2: 35:42

I love it, yeah, and you know, and you're intentional about creating that yeah, and then I also try to like anchor things in with specific things. One of my go-toos is like a. So it's a, it's a celebration like a. So that's what I do always Like when I'm backstage before I'm about to speak at events, I always go. This will be so great. So I'm on like a ton of videos for people's events where I'm backstage going and it's like a hype up and you can feel the energy in your body. So I'll do that when I'm like okay, I got five hours of sleep last night. Okay, I was already tired before I went to bed. Okay, I'm alive. I woke up, I get another chance, I'm grateful I might be able to sleep tonight. Okay, and then it like tricks your, your mind into thinking okay, the body's saying we're happy, let's let, maybe let's follow. That can help me quite a bit. So those little weird rituals that create positive energy.

Speaker 1: 36:46

Yeah, just like I've heard. Like standing in superhero pose yeah, that's super helpful before you go into a meeting or something. You imagine yourself as a superhero, as a king or a queen, um, and then that helps you bring that energy into, into whatever it is that you're doing. So I love that. That is so cool and I love how you share like real life examples right, because it's one thing for somebody to be like stand like this, but you're like no, when I'm on backstage, like I probably look so wild.

Speaker 2: 37:13

But yeah, these are such good questions, my gosh thank you.

Speaker 1: 37:22

Thank you so much, yeah, um so, as we're wrapping up here, um, you mentioned that you have a gift for the audience. I'd love it if you could tell us a little bit about that.

Speaker 2: 37:33

For sure. Okay, so is it cool if I actually just bring it up here now, because I do have something that I think would be really helpful? Are you cool with that, Nicole? Yes, of course. So I have. This is going to be really helpful because I can sit here and talk about how gratitude and like pause we could talk all day, by the way you're so great.

Speaker 2: 37:56

We can talk all day about gratitude and like the power of positive thinking. But when someone's in like that place where they're like I'm so burnt out and overwhelmed I can't even care at this point. It's really hard to get out of that and I know that because I experience it. Point it's really hard to get out of that and I know that because I experience it. So when you're in that burnt out right, that burnt out place, you almost need someone to say, hey, here's a lifeline to just pull you a little closer to shore so you stand a chance to swim to shore. So I actually put together an entire guide for the exact steps that I do.

Speaker 2: 38:29

This isn't available anywhere else um, it's not on my website for this one. So it's the burnout guide. I don't remember the title, I haven't released it, but it's this burnout guide that helps you when you're overwhelmed, there's too much to do and you're in a negative slump and nothing seems to be working. So I would love to gift that to your audience. I'll make sure you get all the details, and then anything else that you need support with you can go to r Petersoncom. I'll use an a D in my last name and there's just tons of free stuff on my site. It's more free than even paid. You'll see that very quickly I love that.

Speaker 1: 39:02

I appreciate that so much and your resources are amazing. Like it's not like you're getting like a little like pretend thing and be like ha ha, you have to go to the next level to get the results. Yeah, no, no. Like you actually provide really good value up front, and so I just want to let you know that I do appreciate it.

Speaker 2: 39:21

I love creating them because I create them based on what I want to see and what would make me say this person's the real deal. I like to see action and results happen, even from freebies, so people can get that free resource. And even if you just latch on to like one of the concepts in there and you're like this helped make getting out of bed today 10% easier Cool, that was a win in my book.

Speaker 1: 39:48

All of the links that she mentioned are going to be available down in the show notes, and usually we wrap up with your biggest tip. So, like, what is the biggest, best aha moment that your clients get? Like, what's that tip that you give them?

Speaker 2: 40:03

Yes, okay. So when my clients and I are working together, every single one of them experiences and expresses doubt in different ways. So some it's through control, wanting to know every single number at all times, and some it looks like emotional, like brain dumps and vents and things like that. And so something I just want to remind everybody is that we all express fear or doubt or those things that are stopping us from taking action differently. So don't try to suppress that, but instead express it. Get out there. Get it out like journal it. Go punch a boxing bag If that's your style it's clearly not mine, um but do the thing that helps you, like get past the doubt, the fear, the, the I don't know if I can do this or I don't see the path like express it so that you can move on, because it's been acknowledged by your brain.

Speaker 1: 41:10

I love that taking action, just creating something, creating something, and you know what it made me think of? I was watching a nurse. She is an OBGYN nurse. She helps women who are giving birth, and she noticed a phenomenon when they're because you know, like there's different stages to giving birth and then each stage has different stages.

Speaker 1: 41:32

I don't know if you saw this video, but the moment that you go from like you know, like the contractions happening, to like it's time to push, right, there's a moment where the mom says something to the effect of I can't do this, yes, this is hard, I need to go to the bathroom. Can't do this, yes, this is too hard, I need to go to the bathroom. And that is how the nurses know that it's time to push, that their body is ready to push is when they think they can't. That's the moment where things are about to get real, and so is that cool, right? And so just to back end your encouragement if you feel like, oh, my god, I can't do this, this is the moment where something is about to be birthed. That's beautiful in your life and you just got to keep moving.

Speaker 2: 42:18

I love that, okay, I want to add to that because, oh my gosh, nicole, we could literally talk all day, I'm not joking. So when I was about to give birth to, dominic was one of the most um, one of the most like I was. I was the most vocal with what I wanted to say and I made all the doctors and nurses stop and I made them look at me and I needed to know that they were listening and I said I just need you to acknowledge for me what I'm about to do. Physically doesn't make sense. This seems impossible. How is a baby supposed to come out of me? Can you please, real fast, just acknowledge for me that this is impossible by what I know. And they're like, yes, and I was like, ok, let's go. And then it was like, ok, that's fine, as long as you can tell me this is impossible and it's still somehow going to happen. Same thing is true in business. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1: 43:10

Oh, that's beautiful. And so that moment of failure where it feels like you just can't anymore, um, that's, you know, that's where magic. So, since we're talking about failure, I just wanted to offer some encouragement. We've all been there, um, and there's there's beauty on the other side. Um, I haven't talked about this a lot, but I was Baker acted when I was younger as well, and so I had to go into the hospital, and so I just want to. You know, I feel safe because you talk about it all the time, but there is hope. There is hope after depression, there is hope after hopelessness, and so, yeah, I just wanted to. I just thought I should mention that. I thought it was important, since this episode is really powerful, like this is some powerful stuff we talked about today.

Speaker 2: 44:00

There is definitely like life after challenges, failures, public failures, there's life after a psych ward. I want to put that out there because more people cord.

Speaker 1: 44:11

I want to put that out there because more people hide that than I think we realize you know, yeah, so I was there and, and yeah, so I just wanted to let you know that I know, I know, I know. All right, so, before we do sign off, the only thing we haven't talked about is how do we follow you on social media.

Speaker 2: 44:30

Oh, easiest place is pretty much on every single platform. I'm at the mrs peterson, or if you search for rachel peterson, with all e's and a d in my last name, it'll come up pretty fast awesome, perfect.

Speaker 1: 44:43

Thank you so much. This has been just absolutely amazing, rachel, you are an absolute gem. You're just an angel.

Speaker 2: 44:50

I just so appreciate you so much for taking the time to hang out with me today this was easy breezy like this didn't feel like, oh, it's an appearance, so thank you for having me thank you and thank you guys for joining us.

Speaker 1: 45:04

This has been amazing and we'll catch you guys next time on the next episode of overcome yourself, the podcast bye.